The next installment... Quotes 16

I hope that when I die, people say about me, 'Boy, that guy sure owed me a lot of money.' -Jack Handey

The only winner in the War of 1812 was Tchaikovsky. -Solomon Short

When love is gone, there's always justice.
And when justice is gone, there's always force.
And when force is gone, there's always Mom.
Hi, Mom! -Laurie Anderson

In the beginning there was nothing. God said, 'Let there be light!' And there was light. There was still nothing, but you could see it a whole lot better. -Ellen DeGeneres

If the English language made any sense, a catastrophe would be an apostrophe with fur. -Doug Larson

Anybody who wants the presidency so much that he'll spend two years organizing and campaigning for it is not to be trusted with the office. -David Broder

If all the world's a stage, I want to operate the trap door. -Paul Beatty

To err is human--and to blame it on a computer is even more so. -Robert Orben

There are three rules for writing the novel. Unfortunately, no one knows what they are. -W. Somerset Maugham

All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy and Jill a rich widow. -Evan Esar